Gotta Love...

A head butt with your dog after a couple of drinks at the neighbors...

Lola???

What gives?

Now I Have A Headache!

Don't we have enough shit on our plate?

Let me stick to head butting those I dislike...

ETA...Did I tell you I hate this private thing????????????

A Few Things That Are On My Mind...

* Hawaii in 11 days!!!! Whoooohoooo! I need to start packing!

* I don't like this whole "PRIVATE" thing... Kinda makes me lonely! Any suggestions??

* My parents dog died...They just lost one a couple of months ago...Very sad! I'm glad they got Jack!

* I'm over this whole "WORK" thing...Again...Any suggestions??

* President Obama isn't paying my mortgage yet...Just curious...Is he paying yours??

* I'm thrilled that my STB Ex husband can no longer visit "Lola's Place" Cuz I'm here to tell you he turned out to be a REAL PIECE OF SHIT!!!

The First "S" is Silent...

It's a bird...

It's a plane...

It's Stereos and Souffles to the rescue.


Today I'm changing her name to SUPER STEREOS & SOUFFLES!

Cuz she is my SUPERHERO! No doubt!

She has swooped in and rescued me more than you know...


There once was this time(at band camp)...and S&S and I were roommates.


A guy showed up UNINVITED to MY bedroom...In the middle of the night!


I was scared...You know panic mode...Found my way to S&S'S bedroom...Still in Panic Mode...


She locked doors...Put me in her bed...She called the cops...Said stalker left...


Not the end...


She hunted that bastard down the next day and told him...

" If he got near me again...She would slit his throat and eat his eyeballs for dinner..."
Or something like that...


Then...

Last night as I am trying to enjoy my Hot Tub...And rid myself of all the drama The Soon To Be Ex is creating in my life right now... (I'll get to this eventually)


My STB EX calls and tells me he is going to bomb "This Joint."

SUPER STEREOS & SOUFFLES to the rescue...again

I refused to exit hot tub on his account...

With a quick phone call S,S &S is on a mission...

She made us private.

Most Importantly...


SHE GOT RID OF HIM!!! WHOOP WHOOP!!

Anyhow...You won't be hearing from her today as she is tapped out from renovating her guest bath and saving my world!

SWEET JESUS!!!

We're alone!

We'll Private...Or Whatever!

I can't stand that dude...and more on that later...actually tomorrow.

Looking forward to a good nights sleep...

Without nightmares of a certain someone bombing "Lola's Place" while I have no control!

Thank you Stereos and Souffles for rescuing me in my frantic state...

Time to go private

Stereos & Souffles here. No, it's not Friday. But I received a call tonight from LL&L that the anonymous asshole AKA -couldn't be an ex-husband soon enough- has threatened to blow up this lovely place and we just can't have that. So I logged on and set her to private in record time. I'm trying to make LL&L's transition a little easier and I've located your emails so that she doesn't get lonely during the transition.

If I could ring this complete waste of space's neck and get away with it, I'd be doing it right now. But since he's certainly not worth going to prison over, we'll just have to wait for karma to take care of him.

He's not out of her life yet, but at least he's out of her blog. Hip Hip Hooray!

My Soon To Be Ex...

Has just informed me via text that we can get a $25.00 divorce at the court house or online...

How's that for stepping up to The Fucking Plate???

Since I filed in September and already have an attorney!

Really??

Seriously???

If it's that simple????

Take charge and be my guest B... If it's legit I'll sign.

I'll be happy to rid my life of you for 25 Bucks...

Hope Y'all Are Sitting Down...

Last night...

I slept in a tent!

And NO it's not because I lost my house...

I did it on purpose.

Our Physical Therapy clinic had a team for Relay For Life to honor one of our favorite patients who was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer. Our Team Name...Quest For The Breast. That's our team up there...Kiddos went home. Adult Beverages were served.

We collected $300.00 over our goal! WhoooHooo!

Molly joined our team being "The Trooper" she is (Oh...and she secretly likes camping...cuz there is Miller Lite involved...I think).

Anyhow...She pitched our tent.

Now I've seen Molly pitch a fit or two in the years I've known her...But a tent! Holy Impressiveness!!!

A true Girl Scout you are Molly! You save my house from burning down and you build me a safe place to sleep...YOU ROCK!

So it started at 6pm and ended at 9am this morning. And the very LOUD music played ALL.NIGHT.LONG!

All in all we had fun. More importantly we raised money for a great cause.

But...

I'm seriously considering booking a room at The Ritz tonight just to get myself balanced again.

Answer me this...

Stereos & Souffles here for your Friday reading pleasure:


Who the hell is 31eVA5QhtojITTaA9cJ?

And how exactly do you pronounce that?

This is one of the followers of my blog.

Don't get me wrong, I love followers, but something is fishy with 31eVA5QhtojITTaA9cJ.
What a pain in the ass signing in with that name.

Are they a Terrorist? Petnapper? Cyber Stalker? Escaped Mental Patient?




Holy shit. Oh God.
Just thought of something.
I think I know who this is.
It takes a big person for such a big name.
That only leaves one person with a vendetta against S&S...




WYNONNA JUDD


Some of you may recall that I wrote a rather scathing letter to Wynonna regarding her promotion and use of the Alli diet pill (think oily stool skid mark.) After a week or so, my husband suggested that I permanently remove the post from my blog for safety reasons and to avoid a headline like this:


"GIANT RED FIRE CROTCH SMOTHERS THIN SARCASTIC BITCH WITH DAY OLD DEPENDS!"


What to do. What to do. Should I block the follower? Leave it be and sleep with one eye open while clutching my bag of potato chips? No, scratch that. She can probably smell potato chips from a mile away. I should lay low for awhile with some baby carrots. No chance of her getting near them.


But what if it's not her? Could 31eVA5QhtojITTaA9cJ be dangerous? I've only got 18 followers and I can't really afford to alienate one. Maybe someday he/she will comment and leave some clue to his/her identity. Let's ponder this until next Friday and see if anything out of the ordinary occurs.


In the meantime, do me a solid. If you spot Wynonna crossing the Florida state line, keep an eye on her for me. That shouldn't be hard.

Free Wine...

Who doesn't love a giveaway!!!! My girlfriend Shannie is hosting a giveaway. How generous is that? One of the gifts is a bottle of her favorite wine. Now y'all know I love wine and I also love free so I'm all over this. Go check out her blog and leave her a comment and you are entered.

P.S. Be nice...She's prego!

Why Is It...

That it only takes two seconds to say "I Do"

And an eternity to say "I Don't ???"

There is clearly something wrong with this! Seriously...Who the fuck is running this system?

If I were in charge you could get a divorce at The Gas Station...

You know when you put your card in and it asks you "Do you want a car wash? Yes or No?"

It would ask "Do you want a divorce? Yes or No?"

Just like that...With the push of a button...I would say "YEP" And while we're at it I'll take a car wash...Cuz I'm anticipating a HOT DATE once we get rid of my husband.

FUCK! I hate this bullshit!

Bare with me I have Bloggers Block.

At least you have Stereos and Souffles to look forward to on Friday.

I am smiling still...Only 23 days til I'm in Hawaii.

Can I Get A Whoop Whoop...

Federal Return Accepted

Dear Life, Love & Lola,
Congratulations! The IRS has accepted your federal tax return. There's nothing else you need to do.

^^^

Look ...


That's the email I received from Our Government! More importantly then them accepting my taxes...They told me there is nothing else I need to do.

So my taxes were accepted, I have a nice return coming and Our Government has told me to Take it Easy!!! Sweet!

She said WHAT???

This is Stereos & Souffles, your featured Friday blogger. I need a temporary x-rated outlet since my blog is linked to my business. LL&L needs a day off. As you know, she's got a lotta shiz on her plate. Don't worry, I'm being compensated.

This is a public service announcement...
It's hard out there for a shrimp.

Your friends have informed you that a guy has a tiny weiner that requires a magnifying glass to locate it.

Green bean vs. pinky finger...it's a toss up.

I cannot knowingly authorize any of my friends to date and or spend time with tiny shuttlecock.

LL&L...dream bigger.

Y'all have a surprise in the AM...

Can't tell you now...

Cuz it's a surprise!

Cool?

I'm So Glad...

I still have my teeth!

Cuz apparently when you are old you forget them...Occasionally.

Patient walks into the clinic... "Ooops I forgot my teeth."

That would be the patient at the clinic who wants to adopt me... Cool! She would be easy to cook for. Who needs teeth...We're having milkshakes for dinner!

Or how about the patient today who when asked "Is there anything else we can help with...Regarding your daily life activities?"

His response..."I need a girlfriend."

Sorry dude...Can't help you there!

You are on your own!

We also have a patient that "OINKS!" He says he does it cuz all men are pigs...And that some just make more money than others...

So What...

If it looks like a BOMB went off in my office...

My taxes are done!

9 days early...THANK.YOU.VERY.MUCH!

And I E-Filed so I don't have to worry about them returning them...For lack of signature (like last year)!

How do you like me now April 15th???

Lola's birthday ROCKED! Talk about spoiled!!! Doggie Ice Cream and Treats Galore!

We had friends and dog friends over...

Which in turn lead to diarrhea this morning (her...not me)

But what the hell...It only happens once a year!

She thanks you all for her birthday wishes!

TODAY...

Is Lola's Birthday!

Happy Birthday Sweet Hound! The BIG 5!

Which makes her 35 in dog years...And older than me.

So if I ignore any of you today...

It's because I'm spoiling my dog rotten!

This Place Just Keeps Getting Better...

I already feel like I'm on vacation!

I received a text from Stereos & Souffles on my way home from work...All she said was "Check out your Blog."

I knew I gave her a key to "This Joint" for a reason...

First A Hawaii Countdown...Now music (sorry if I got any of y'all in troubie at work today...turn your volume off in the future).

and of course...Y'all make it great too!

I.LOVE.THIS.PLACE!!!!!!