Saturday, August 9, 2008


I volunteered at The Wildlife Rescue.

My job...

To Feed The Raccoons! Yes, you heard me feed those creepy little bastards! There are about 40 or so of them in cages that were abandoned when then were babies. When they are a little more mature they will be released.

These critters are going to be in for a RUDE AWAKENING once they are back in the wild. As they eat like kings and queens at this joint.

On the menu, Scrumptious Parfaits. That's what I made. SEVEN.FUCKING.HUGE.BOWLS.OF.THEM.

The recipe

Layer the following ingredients:
4 cups dog food
Two cups water
Chopped cantaloupe
Chopped watermelon
Chopped apples
Chopped pears
Chopped peaches
Chopped kiwi
Chopped celery
Chopped squash
Chopped carrots
Top with bread

Seriously, this is what they are fed daily!

Raccoons! The creatures that dumpster dive! The bastards that knock my trash can over in the middle of the night looking for anything they can get their creepy little fingers on.

Then you know what they do when you are trying to serve them their gourmet lunch?

They HISSSSSSSS at you.


Ms. Florida Transplant said...

Maybe you could adopt one of these raccoons. I think that would make for some really interesting blogging!

"Life, Love, Lola, & Crazy Raccoons...?"

Shannie said...

LMAO!!!!! Yeah! ^^^^ Lola might not like that, though. But, it would be fuuuuunnnnnny!

Live.Love.Eat said...

How cool of you to volunteer. That's funny but I have a soft spot for those guys..they're kinda cute. I was once kayaking near Sebastian Inlet and there was one in a cage on a little island. I paddled over and set it free. He didn't seem so grateful so you're right about that part....but I like 'em anyhow :)

Etiquettely Correct said...

Thats really cool - I can't believe how high class their meals are!!